#42. Author Debut In Second Half Of 2024 – Ghost Chilli by Nikkitha Bakshani (Paperback)

I never like reading a book and feeling that I’m going to be telling the world that I didn’t like it; especially when it is the author’s debut novel and you know the amount of time and effort it will have taken for them to write the story.

I received an uncorrected proof of Ghost Chilli to read and my initial excitement turned to dismay as I struggled through the first few chapters. I logged onto NetGalley to read the handful of people’s opinions that had been submitted and they weren’t positive.

I did persevere though and about 100 pages in I had a lightbulb moment, I started to see the novel through fresh eyes. I found I couldn’t put the book down because I had begun to hope that things would get better for the protagonist. So, what is Ghost Chilli about, and why did my aversion at the beginning suddenly change?

“Muskan has a great life: a creative job in the big city, supportive friends, and no trouble finding first dates. So what if her colleagues don't know she exists, or her friends won't stop lecturing her about the three-year 'situationship' she's in? It's not like she's starving.

But something is wrong, and while the people around her seem to have all the right words, nobody can articulate what they want from each other. As obstacles mount and the easy-going persona Muskan has built starts to crumble, she is forced to face a question that's been quietly burning at the back of her mind: Why did her family move to America so abruptly?”

When the book fell through my letterbox, I was instantly intrigued about the storyline; so many unanswered questions fluttered around my head. Once I started the book, I found myself reading and re-reading lines, trying to concentrate on who was saying what, because I couldn’t find a natural rhythm or flow in the dialogue. I actually started wondering if the fault lay with me because I wasn’t Indian-American, but then I thought, I can get into the heads of characters who are men, who are young or old, who are from other parts of the world, so I should be able to get into the head of Muskan and her friends and understand the conversations…but I couldn’t. The problems that Muskan faces are problems we’ve all faced from time to time, they’re universal, so why did I find it so hard to read each page? I came to the conclusion that I found the writing “clunky” and that the conversations were too stilted between friends, not at all life-like and that was why I felt a bit of an outsider.

I also realised that I didn’t like the protagonist, I wanted to slap her, give her a shake, to tell her to stop crying, or to stop being such a bitch, and suddenly at that moment I realised that Nikkitha Bakshani had played a blinder. Muskan is ‘unlucky’ in love because men meet her, don’t like her and dump her. Friends get tired of her attitude, they find her draining, which is how I felt when reading about her. That for me was when I had a change of heart and I wanted to understand why Muskan was so unlikable, why she, like me, felt like an outsider amongst all of these characters.

Muskan’s situation reminds me a little of Carrie Bradshaw (Sex and the City.) Muskan is a writer living in Brooklyn searching for the right man, and leaning on her closest friends for advice, to vent, or just to have a shoulder to cry on. Muskan feels like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders, but to the outside world she must be having the time of her life. She works on a luxury lifestyle magazine, but in reality, she is just another cog in the corporate wheel. Exploited by her boss and co-workers, the glamour and glitz doesn’t make an appearance in her downtrodden life.

This book follows Muskan’s journey as she tries to understand why her life doesn’t run as smoothly as her friends. They all have boyfriends and successful jobs. They all want to spend time with one another, but, unlike Carrie Bradshaw, they don’t always want to spend time with her.

When her friends encourage Muskan to see a therapist, she starts to confront her childhood fears. The therapist says she probably has complex PTSD, but rather than being shocked or upset, Muskan flippantly agrees. She’s got the app, done the test, it’s not a point worth pursuing. Muskan has an answer for everything, it’s an aggravating trait, but eventually you realise this deflective technique is what helps Muskan to get through the day.

Her friends think that the root of her problems are her issues with her mother. Her self-esteem has been destroyed due to her domineering mother’s attitude; everything Muskan does or says is wrong. She knows her family suddenly moved to America when she was ten but she doesn’t know why they fled. On a trip to visit her dying aunt in India, she realises how much more comfortable and confident she feels there, seeking answers and exploring her family history. There is a dawning comprehension of how unalive she feels in America and that she can’t continue living with the same routines once she returns.

Muskan’s father moved the family from Chennai to New Jersey when she was still a child. Her father was a wealthy businessman and her mother had a successful career until she had children. She had to abandon her home, her job, and her beloved sister, in order to give her children a better life, so what impact had these changes made on her? Was she always lashing out at Muskan because she was full of regret, or anger; did she feel that Muskan wasn’t using the advantages given to her and those sacrifices were therefore wasted? I wanted to know so much more from this mother daughter relationship.

This book is about finding honest relationships in an increasingly dishonest world, where feeling isolated has become the norm. How many people find themselves pretending all is OK because they don’t want to share the burden of their unhappiness with people close to them. Sometimes witty, sometimes poignant, all aspects of modern life are covered in the various relationships housed in this book.

I started to feel some empathy with Muskan – it must be depressing being part of a group of friends and suddenly realising that you’re the odd one out. Finding yourself so unlucky in love that you will waste your time running after a dead-end relationship, because you know that every first date with the “perfect guy” will also be the last. To have such a toxic relationship with your mother who belittles you at every opportunity, sapping every bit of strength and hope from you. It must be exhausting and soul destroying, yet Muskan carries on with her life regardless.

I did enjoy reading Ghost Chilli (eventually) but the book is far from perfect. It felt rushed, especially towards the end. One chapter it’s Christmas Eve, the next it’s suddenly Valentines Day and then it’s the end of the book. Many of the questions at the start remaining unanswered. Relationships were not fully explored and therefore it was hard to engage with the characters or visualise who they really were. I think with a little more editing, this could have been a magical book.

 

Thank you to Fleet (Little, Brown Book Group) for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Genre: Modern and Contemporary Fiction

Release Date: 4^th July 2024

Publisher: Fleet (Little, Brown Book Group)

Pages: 288

 

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