#12. Starting With The Letter "L" – Lullaby by Leila Slimani (Paperback)


“The baby is dead. It took only a few seconds.”

Browsing the local bookshop, I gasped in shock as I read those words. The first chapter is only 2.5 pages long, so I just continued reading, mouth open.  Immediately I knew I wanted to read this book, and that it was one I wouldn’t put down until it was finished, so armed with my new purchase, I headed off to the local park, bought an ice-cream, and continued reading.

“When Myriam decides to return to work, she and her husband look for a nanny for their two young children. They find their dream candidate: Louise: a quiet, polite and devoted woman who sings to their children, cleans the family's chic Paris apartment, stays late without complaint and hosts enviable birthday parties. But as the couple and their nanny become increasingly dependent on each other, jealousy, resentment and suspicions start to breed, and Myriam and Paul's idyllic domesticity is shattered.”

From the first lines, Leila Slimani sets out her intention, that this is going to be a horrific tale and one that those triggered by child violence should not read. There is not going to be a soft approach to any of the issues which are raised in this book. Within the first paragraph you know that a baby is dead, a little girl is in a critical condition and the mother is hysterical. A 4th person has tried to take their own life. The wheels have been set in motion and the reader must make an uncomfortable decision, keep reading and head out on a  journey to find out how and why the children are dead, or leave the book on the shelf and find something less disturbing in the bookshop.

TRUST. Such a short word, but so powerful. Believing someone, hoping that they are honest, reliable, that they are speaking the truth…it is a difficult thing to do, especially the older you get. We put trust in people all our lives, from our early years of trusting someone with a secret that they then tell the whole school about, so you find out that they’re not as reliable as once thought, to getting older and trusting a complete stranger to operate on us.

I’ve never had the worry about employing someone to look after a child. The closest I’ve got to is when I go on holiday, there’s only one person I trust with the welfare of my cat; God knows what I’ll do if I (or they) ever move house. I know my cat is safe, so I really can’t imagine how hard it would be for me to put my trust in someone to look after my flesh and blood – especially a small defenceless child.

“ ‘My nanny is a miracle-worker.’ That is what Myriam says when she describes Louise’s sudden entrance into their lives.”

After interviewing several candidates for the role of a nanny, Myriam and Paul decide they have struck gold when Louise walks into their life. She is immediately at ease holding the baby and playing games with Mila, calling her a princess. She cooks dinner and cleans the house so that Myriam can concentrate on her career as a successful lawyer, and Paul can continue with his demanding schedules working as a music producer. Louise quickly makes herself indispensable, the household has never run so smoothly, but there is already a chilling discomfort as each page is turned, the reader is aware, unlike the parents, that Louise is no Mary Poppins.

Slimani has written a chilling and clever novel, because the reader is always a step ahead of the family. As the family live in their ignorant bliss, as a reader you are silently shouting at the parents to get rid of the nanny. However important their respective careers might be, the children need to come first. There is something horrific in watching events unfurl and not being able to do anything about it, and for a time you forget this is just a book, the story is not real. But then you question could it happen in real life and then all these true crime dramas come to mind…and then you start to wonder, if it did, would I be able to see the warning signs, or would I be blissfully unaware like Myriam and Paul until it was too late?

Louise is a fascinating, complex character. At times, Slimani’s prose has you feeling sympathy towards her. Set in Paris, you can see the inequality in living standards, and that behind Louise’s perfect exterior, there is a life of brutality, of unpaid bills and squalor. This is a woman who has endured domestic violence and nearly aborted her daughter, a daughter whom she struggled to form any meaningful relationship with. She yearns for all the things she sees her past and present employers have. We begin to learn that whilst she makes the effort to cook for others and make their evenings comfortable, no-one has ever done the same for her. Slowly you begin to unpick the real person hidden deep inside this perfect nanny.    

In the apartment, the atmosphere grows heavier. Myriam tries not to let the children perceive it, but she is more distant with Louise. She speaks to her in a clipped voice, giving her precise instructions. She follow’s Paul’s advice, which she repeats to herself: ‘She’s our employee, not our friend.’ ”

Louise’s job as a nanny means she notices everything about her employers, the secrets they hide, yet she is invisible to them. She is just the nanny, they don’t see she is a person who yearns for a little recognition for the thankless task of always being there for their little darlings while they concentrate on their careers. When she is invited on holiday with the family and they find out she can’t swim, instead of empathy and understanding, she is ridiculed. Suddenly you find yourself feeling some sympathy for Louise, forgetting momentarily what she has done, because the family are rude, unfeeling, unkind.

When Louise first started in the job she received glowing comments, but that quickly disappeared as expectations of her grew. Simple things like sharing a cup of tea with Myriam are withdrawn, and you slowly begin to understand how this effects Louise, a person who is ultimately lonely and misunderstood, silently crying out for someone to make her feel like a human being.

It slowly dawns on Louise that she is not as important to the family as she believed, and her obsessive nature becomes more dangerous, with her actions become darker and more depraved. And you know that even if you could shout a warning to the parents, they wouldn’t believe you. Louise is too perfect, she has noted every little detail about Paul and Myriam’s friends, what their food preferences are, and so her Friday night dinners are legendary. Everything is done to perfection, all  tasks completed whilst her young charges play at her feet. How does she do it?

Whilst this is a quick book to read, the tension created throughout the book is astounding and it brings to light the complexities of modern parenthood and asks the questions as to whether we really can have it all? Whilst the eventual murders might seem a bit extreme and unlikely to happen, it is staggering how Slimani can take the reader through a journey of a persons damaged psyche, and make her irrational actions almost seem rational. I’m not condoning what Louise did, but once you venture through her earlier life, you can recognise why it happened, why she was so mentally unstable.

Life isn’t fair, there will be those who are blessed with children, money, a nice house, whilst others will be penniless, destitute. Marriage will not be equal, or easy, it will cause tension, and children will further increase that tension. This is a book that highlights these issues in a blunt manner. It is easy to sit and judge people for the decisions they make, but this book forces the reader to view things from various people’s perspectives and opens channels for conversation starters. It is hard to have empathy for a person who has committed murder, but would she have become so obsessed with the family if she hadn’t been so lonely or desperate to fit in?

I finished this book feeling a raft of emotions, anger, heartbreak, dread, empathy, despair. I felt uncomfortable, I was put in a position where I had to look at individuals and I felt mixed emotions about them all. This might be a tragic and difficult storyline to read, but it is well worth making the effort to do so.

 

Genre: Fiction, Thriller, Mystery Thriller, Psychological Thriller, Crime

Release Date: 26th July 2018

Publisher: Faber & Faber

Pages: 218

 

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